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Author Topic: Ridiculous statements made by pet food companies  (Read 5824 times)
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Jr. Member
Posts: 45

« on: April 30, 2007, 11:29:57 AM »

Anyone else sick of hearing this crap?  Feel free to add your own.

"Our company has not been affected by the recall."
Yet. You forgot to say "yet." Your gluten-filled food is processed by one of the affected factories. Say yet.
"All of our OTHER products are safe."
That's what you said last month. Then you issued a second recall.
"None of our OTHER flavors have been affected by the recall."
Yes they have. Once you recalled the first batch of tainted food, we lost faith in your company. Thus, we're staying away from all of your crap, recalled or not.
"None of our products have been recalled and WON'T BE."
Really? Won't be? No matter what? You use grains and contract out to one of the plants that is at the center of this fiasco.  Are you saying that under no circumstances will you recall a product? Ever? Ummmmm....
"Our food is 100% guaranteed. Return recalled products to the store for a complete refund."
Great. A new pet-sized urn costs about the same as 100 cans of refunded pet food.
"We use only human grade ingredients."
Zippity freaking doo dah. Almost every pet food company claims this. Human grade food can be contaminated too, or haven't you noticed?
"It's not our fault! We didn't know rice protein was in our food."
You claimed you inspected your own food before, during, and after processing.  If that were true, you would've noticed the addition of rice products, poisoned or not.
"But we didn't know!!!"
It's your responsibility to know what's in the food you sell. Your whining is unimpressive.  Have fun pointing fingers and suing the other guy. In the meantime, we entered into contractual relationships with YOU when we bought your food that you advertised as safe and healthy.  You let us down.
"Ignore the ingredient list on your bag's label. The correct ingredient list is on our updated website."
"We have 6 months to update our labels."
No you don't. Please, show us, in writing, what regulation says you're allowed to do that.
"We are a self-contained company."
You contract out your food to different plants in different states and/or countries, and refuse to tell us who your supplier is. Define "self-contained."
"All of our ingredients are inspected."
By whom? For what? How? When?
"We will be looking for a new plant to manufacture our own food."
OK, that's a good start. But while you're looking, don't expect us to buy products that you've already had made for you at affected plants.
"[We] have no plans to alter [our] relationship with Menu Foods."
You win the prize for stupidest reply to a customer's question.
"That flavor has not been recalled. Your pet must be sick from something else."
"The FDA has reported 17 or 18 deaths..."
Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
"[Grain] gluten is a healthy, ideal source of protein for pets."
Correction: Gluten is a CHEAP source of protein used in pet food.  So is melamine.
"Menadione is a healthy source of Vitamin K activity."
Pssst. We're not that gullible.
"We'll be removing [specific ingredient] later this year."
Why not now?
"Made in the USA."
Translation: "This product is packaged in the USA.  Ingredients may come from anywhere, but we're not advertising that. Don't worry your pretty little head about this. Just sit back and enjoy the picture of Old Glory printed on our label." 
"The only ingredient we outsource is lamb from New Zealand."
I guess you don't consider it outsourcing when you hire an American supplier to import your ingredients from other countries for you.  But while we're on the topic, can't you find any good sheep in America?
"Our [specific ingredient in a specific flavor of pet food] is from our certified organic supplier in Pakistan"
You HAVE to be kidding. (Thanks Howl911 for that tidbit!)
"Only a small percentage of our food comes from Asia."
You know what's fun? Buying American. Give it a try. You might like it.
"We feed it to our pets too!"
Have you reported your own pets' deaths and illnesses to the FDA?
"We recalled all our products VOLUNTARILY. We're not like other companies."
Shut up. The FDA doesn't have the power to recall pet foods involuntarily. EVERY pet food recall has been "voluntary."  You didn't bother to recall your products until after the FDA informed you that they were poisoned.  Stop praising yourself and acting like you behaved in an extraordinary or altruistic manner. You're in the same boat as all the other pet food companies whose products were recalled.
"As soon as we learned there was a problem, we issued a recall."
Not quite. You received customer complaints last year and/or at the beginning of this year. Your recall wasn't issued until a few weeks ago, and only after the FDA informed you of what was in your food. You operated with virtually no quality control and ignored earlier warnings that customers gave you.
"Due to the heavy volume of email, we may not be able to reply immediately."
It's been 6 weeks. Perhaps you might get around to answering my email today.
"Due to the heavy volume of calls, you may want to hang up and try your call again later."
Here's a newsflash: Customers have lost faith in you. Your company is in trouble. Get your act together, put in some overtime, hire more customer service reps, and pick up the freaking phone.
"Someone will call you back tonight."
It's been 2 weeks. I'm still waiting for that return call.
"I can't give you that information. It's proprietary."
So is this cash in my wallet.  Next!
"I don't have an answer to that question."
You are the customer service guy who picks up the phone when consumers call the toll-free number printed on your products. Your only job is to answer callers' questions about your food. Perhaps you should get that information. Go ahead. Do it now. Stand up, walk over to your boss's desk, tell her that customers are angry because you can't answer the questions.  Go on. You can do this.
"It was a clerical error."
Give me a break.
"We have hired [crisis management/spin doctoring/PR firm] to deal with customer complaints."
You know what's even better than spin? Honesty. How about you just answer our questions honestly? Let the NY Times interview your plant workers.
"We are based in California."
Your CEO has an office in California, but your food is made elsewhere. Why?
"We are deeply saddened..."
Apparently not sad enough to come completely clean.
"We are committed to pets."
You are committed to profit.
E. Hamilton
« Reply #1 on: April 30, 2007, 11:40:17 AM »

translation we got caught!
Jr. Member
Posts: 43

« Reply #2 on: April 30, 2007, 12:28:28 PM »

From our friends at the pet food institute:

The pet food industry remains a partner in the investigation with the FDA

That's the agency that can't count past the teens? Great, we'll be getting a lot done.

The total number of pets that have been affected after eating contaminated food remains to be determined, but we know that even if just one pet is lost, it’s one loss too many.

translation: fortunately, companion animals are quite prolific and new generations will be available for poisoning soon.
Full Member
Posts: 56

« Reply #3 on: April 30, 2007, 01:33:18 PM »

Pet food Institute:

"Fortunately, some 99 percent of pet food still remains unaffected by the recall and may be purchased with confidence,” Ekedahl wrote."

They're still sticking to 1% of all pet food, although the recall has continued to expand over 7 weeks.  Huh

If you find the educational information Feline Outreach provides of value, we hope you'll consider a donation to further our efforts.  Thank you!
Jr. Member
Posts: 20

« Reply #4 on: April 30, 2007, 02:57:18 PM »

This isn't a recall, our product is still good.

Huh?  Did they feel left out?

Hero Member
Posts: 1849

« Reply #5 on: April 30, 2007, 03:17:59 PM »

Your forgot this one.

"What is the purpose of this inquiry?"
« Last Edit: April 30, 2007, 03:22:17 PM by Steve » Logged
Hero Member
Posts: 1849

« Reply #6 on: April 30, 2007, 03:24:50 PM »

"Hey, she gets it why not you! Just shut t f up and buy our stuff!!!!"
« Last Edit: May 01, 2007, 07:38:13 AM by Steve » Logged
Hero Member
Posts: 1849

« Reply #7 on: April 30, 2007, 03:28:37 PM »

"Hey buddy look. We're not selling pet food we're selling a lifestyle"
« Reply #8 on: April 30, 2007, 05:39:05 PM »

"Our hearts go out to those of you who......"

I'll be sick if I see that on one more website! Angry
Jr. Member
Posts: 45

« Reply #9 on: May 01, 2007, 07:28:40 AM »

HA!! Thanks you guys. This is the first time I've laughed about any of this mess. Unfortunately, I know that what everyone here is saying is true, and this spin-doctoring is resulting in more sick and dead pets.  So it's not actually funny. But it's just so ludicrous, I can't help myself. 
Now back to crying over the loss of my beloved kitty.
Jr. Member
Posts: 43

« Reply #10 on: May 01, 2007, 10:14:21 AM »

I'm sorry that you lost your little friend, Rollo. I've still got my guys with me, no thanks to the pet food people. One has chronic renal failure, and I'm sure it's something he ate (last summer), but I'll never be able to prove it. I know it doesn't help, but our companions showed us what a terrible mess the state of our food supply is in. They're heroes, and I'll remember each and every one that way.
Full Member
Posts: 88

« Reply #11 on: May 01, 2007, 12:54:01 PM »

I was close to my pet getting sick. Thank god I had an older bag without tainted ingrediant in it. My baby could've died.
Jr. Member
Posts: 43

« Reply #12 on: May 01, 2007, 01:44:15 PM »

we really shouldn't ignore the FDA and USDA and their absurd statements:

Pork is a small part of most people’s diets.

and now, since that was such an unqualified hit, we have:

Poultry is a small part of most people’s diets.

actually, it seems that food is a small part of people's diets.

then we have (drum roll, please):

Dilution effect

To listen to them talk about this, you'd think that pet food was 100% melamine. everything else but that is diluted.

and the grand finale:

...likelihood of illness is extremely low coupled with ...absence of toxicity data on melamine

if there's not enough data on melamine, how can they say with any authority that risk is low?

Jr. Member
Posts: 45

« Reply #13 on: May 01, 2007, 10:18:09 PM »

Thanks. He was a happy and good little cat. I'm really sorry to hear about your boy's CRF.  This whole mess is just devastating.  Sad

But back to the "Are you kidding me?" theme, my head almost exploded when I read about the dilution effect. Here's one I keep hearing from a Life's Abundance stalker, er, I mean field rep:

"Our products are safe BECAUSE they're human grade."
Sometimes I feel like no one is paying attention.
Posts: 3

« Reply #14 on: May 02, 2007, 01:09:23 AM »

I've heard a few of these comments by pet food companys as well.

My dog just had surgery to remove bladder stones and crystals.

His urinalysis showed melamine.

It's been hard to laugh lately but tonight as I read this I did.

My thoughts on their next move to sell their products could look something like this.

Our new melamine free formula

 Our slogan is It's ok to put your dogs food in a plascit bowl
 but it's never ok to put plastic food in your dogs bowl

Geeeee I wonder if that statement would instill confidence in their food?

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