Itchmo Forums for Cats & Dogs Brought to you by Itchmo: Essential news, humor and info for cats, dogs and pet owners.
May 23, 2019, 03:41:37 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
News:
 
   Home   Help Search Login Register  

Go To Itchmo.com: Read the latest cat, dog and pet news, pet food recall info, product reviews and more — updated daily.


Pages: [1] 2
  Print  
Author Topic: Getting upset about pets  (Read 5679 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
alek0
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 3242


« on: February 09, 2010, 10:17:50 PM »

Do you get upset over how people treat their pets?

I've been quite upset whole day over a photo of an injured cat (posted on a Croatian cooking website which I regularly visit due to my interest in baking and decorating),
and over the fact that the cat just had some ointment applied on the wound and he has been let out again (she said he looked so sad and kept asking to go out and she let him!).
I just don't understand it. She claims to care for the cat, she said there are four vets in the house so he is getting care (how come, when only aloe based topical ointment was administered, there is a big wound on the neck and injured eye!!! ). Please advise what can be done to convince her to keep the cat indoors until he heals and to take him to an outside vet if the household members are unwilling to do anything to help. I am just horrified at the photos of that poor cat, and I've been crying whole morning. I've tried to explain that wounded cat has no business being outside especially in the mating season (he is not neutered), that other animals would be more likely to attack him if he is wounded, that eye injuries need to be attended promptly, etc. but no effect. Is there any approach how to explain this better?

Btw, I would also like to mention I tend to be very sensitive when it comes to the topic of pets. I can't even watch movies where animal dies. I can't read threads in Memorials and Support part of the board (apologies to everyone on that, just makes me feel so sad and I just can't). Now I am just so worried about that poor cat, who has been let outside for the night with a big wound on the neck and injured eye. Suggestions would be welcome how to deal with this. If anyone has suggestions what arguments to use to convince her to keep the cat inside  and provide better treatment, let me know.

Also, if you think I should mind my own business also feel free to tell me. Due to my sensitivity to pet topics I might be overreacting, but the cat looks awful, bloody eye which cannot open fully and a neck injury. I didn't want to put the link to the photo of the cat here, it looks pretty bad, it is enough that I am upset Sad She does seem to love her cat, just how to get that point across that sometimes we have to not give in to what they want and even do some unpleasant things like administering medication for their own good. It is a part of being a pet parent, I guess.


Logged
Mandycat
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 5605


« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2010, 10:34:15 PM »

Alek,
I can understand how you feel.  I also get very upset by injured animals of any kind and worry about any cat I see roaming outside.  Some people can care for their pets, but they just don't seem to have the same feelings as people like you and I.  You probably will never get your message through to someone like that, so all you can really do is pray that the poor cat does not get any more injuries and that he somehow is able to heal.  BTW, I don't think I would ever take my pet to those 4 vets!   Angry
Logged
August
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 6058



« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2010, 10:34:44 PM »

Alek0,  

As silly as this might seem, I couldn't even read the info in your post completely.  As soon as I saw you were going to explain about an injured cat, I could only bring myself to very lightly scan what you wrote.

I am so incredibly sensitive to that kind of thing that if someone starts talking about an injured animal, I have to insist that they stop.  There have been times when someone will casually mention something and I will start to cry.  It's that bad.  I don't know why I'm so sensitive, but it's become TONS and TONS worse since getting the 4 siblings.  I even generally feel scared to read posts here if it has to do with sickness, because I tend to think about it for days, though I know how very, very important this support group is, so I try to find some strength to read,...

I absolutely will NOT go to see ANY movie with an animal theme.  I remember my family went to see Gorillas in the Midst (I think it's called?) and I sat out in the lobby while they watched it.  

(I'm just trying to read your post again now, and I feel completely the same way as you.  I do avoid some threads for fear of feeling terrible, and my apologies to those who need comfort during that.  I would certainly be interested to have some suggestions how to handle these emotions better, too.)

I've also gotten a LOT more sensitive about seeing people wearing down jackets with fur around the hood.

I cannot go into pet shops.

When I donate clothing to a store that donates their proceeds to an animal shelter, I look up the address and don't look at any of the pages.

Even writing just this...makes me feel emotional.  It's pretty strange.
Logged

Larges born 5/07
Sunday born prob 5/09
Tinies born 3/10
JJ
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 8531


« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2010, 11:03:39 PM »

alek is the cat also in Croatia? You might want to do a lil searching on their customs and how they refer/consider pets. They might look at this a lot differently than you, I, MC or anyone else on here. How they are going about this might be perfectly acceptable in Croatia but we treat animals differently.

I have gone up to compete strangers on the street when they are being abrupt or abusive to their pets and let them know about it. I could get a very irate person coming at me but stand my ground and they back off. I  have a big thing about hurting children or animals - neither will sit well in my book, ever.

After your research you might have a better idea of their culture, etc.
Logged

May your troubles be less,
Your blessings be more,
And nothing but happiness
Come through your door
catwoods
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 6749



« Reply #4 on: February 09, 2010, 11:07:44 PM »

Alek, I understand your feelings about this, it's very upsetting. I'm so tired tonight, and I can't think of any other stategies to convince the people besides those you have already mentioned, so I hope someone else will have some ideas. The only thing I can think of is that since the injuries sound like they are likely from an encounter with another animal, it makes little sense to send the cat back outside where he will be among other animals again. I agree, the cat should most certainly be kept inside, and all the wounds treated; the cat should probably have an antibiotic shot to ward off infection.

Kudos to you for the efforts you have made on this kitty's behalf. If you are unable to have an effect on the actions of this person through further suggestions, you may have to accept that you have done your best and you can only send your hopes and prayers. That kind of acceptance is very hard to do and it breaks my heart, too. Cry
« Last Edit: February 10, 2010, 12:42:32 PM by catwoods » Logged
alek0
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 3242


« Reply #5 on: February 10, 2010, 12:31:22 AM »

I have a good idea about their culture since I am Croatian (though I left 13 years ago), it is considered a bad thing to keep cats as indoor only,
but it is also considered normal to keep injured cat indoors. Neutering is also considered cruel especially by older generation, so I have been quiet on that,
just commenting that he should be kept indoors until he heals and should be taken to a vet promptly because of the eye and need for antibiotics.
She has now deleted the photos of injuries, and I have posted under another photo of the cat (before the injury) to ask whether he has come home and
whether there is any change. I just hope he will recover. It is definitely injury caused by other animals, it is mating season now and males get into fights.

It is indeed hard to accept that nothing can be done Sad

And my apologies once again to everyone for my lack of participation on Memorials and Support. Like August, I would appreciate advice how to handle my
emotions better, since I simply can't read that, I cry from just seeing the titles of the threads in latest posts. I wasn't that bad before I got Stefie & Mitzie,
but that's the way things are now. I am not that emotional about things not related to animals, though.

Thanks for listening anyway, I can't talk about this with bf because he just tells me I shouldn't get that upset over things I see on the boards. Yeah, right, that really helps  Roll Eyes
Logged
alek0
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 3242


« Reply #6 on: February 10, 2010, 02:00:12 AM »

Update - the cat is back home, no new injuries, still not brought to a vet, and still just application of local ointment to the neck wound and a complaint
that cat is not cooperating with that since it hurts.

I have repeated again that vets or doctors at home usually tend not to be objective (they are either overprotective or too dismissive in an
attempt to compensate for emotional involvement) when there is something wrong with family members, and that she should bring the cat to an outside vet for second opinion
and that eye wounds need to be treated promptly. I guess if there is still no change in her attitude I'd better try to stop there, because it wouldn't help
the situation to irritate her further, you can bring the horse to the water but you can't make him drink...

I just hope the poor cat will get better, it is a lovely cat, all cream-white with fluffy tail. I just feel so bad about this whole thing, so helpless trying to explain and just not getting through.
I guess part of the problem is that I don't see any logic in letting badly injured cat go outside, I don't understand how her mind works and if that is the case it is not likely that
I'll manage to come up with arguments she will find convincing.
Logged
JJ
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 8531


« Reply #7 on: February 10, 2010, 02:49:06 AM »

Alek maybe she doesn't see the cat as injured as you do and feels its ok to let it outside. Maybe the cat is used to being out and was putting up a fuss in order to be let out and we all know how loud a cat or dog can be when they want something so rather than listen to the cat maybe she decided it was best to let it out? I don't know, just thinking out loud on this.

It is upsetting to all of us when we feel an animal needs to be better taken care of  and we can offer solutions or opinions but have to just take it in stride as it is not our pet but theirs as hard as this might sound and it breaks our hearts we can only pray that the pet gets thru it as best as possible. Maybe the woman was offended when you made recommendations as maybe she felt she was taking the best care of her cat that she knew how? Take comfort that the cat is being fed and has a house to stay in where a lot of animals do not.

Logged

May your troubles be less,
Your blessings be more,
And nothing but happiness
Come through your door
alek0
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 3242


« Reply #8 on: February 10, 2010, 04:48:56 AM »

Yes, yes, yes! Woohooo!

She took him to a vet, he got antibiotics for five days +topical ointment. Hopefully he'll get well soon.

I still feel bad about the whole matter, since I find such confrontations rather unpleasant. It is hard to judge how
much you can push in trying to convince, since there is always possibility that the other person will just get
offended and then deliberately won't follow the advice. Well, at least she did get the cat to the vet, so that's something.
I won't comment further on neutering or other issues, the most important thing has been accomplished.

Thanks again for listening, this has really been bothering me a lot.
Logged
JustMe
Administrator
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 10517


My RB Angels Elvis, 1991-2010, and Twit, 2001-2010


« Reply #9 on: February 10, 2010, 04:58:45 AM »

aleko....I haven't been on much lately, so just seeing this.   I have no advice, but just wanted to give you {{{hugs}}}. 
Logged

Eventually they will understand,
Replied the glorious cat
For I will whisper into their hearts
That I am always with them
I just am....forever and ever and ever.
Poem for Cats, author unknown

"A kitten in the animal kingdom is like a rosebud in a garden", author unknown
Meowli
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 2991


Oscar


« Reply #10 on: February 10, 2010, 05:14:07 AM »

Alek0, You are among many of us who get very upset at the thought of injured animals. I can't watch a movie when one gets hurt or killed either - even though I know in a movie it is staged. I am glad the poor kitty finally got some antibiotics! I agree with JJ that cats can make a big fuss to go out if that is what they are used to. Battle-scars and all. Machismo...  Sad  ps, this - fighting- is another reason (besides too many unwanted pets) for neutering.

Meowli
« Last Edit: February 10, 2010, 08:53:12 AM by Meowli » Logged
JoMax
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 1523



« Reply #11 on: February 10, 2010, 05:55:31 AM »

Alek0 - first:
Well done - your persistence paid off and has helped this cat get some decent treatment.  That is so worthwhile - you did brilliantly.

Second, yes, I too get really upset about anything bad to do with animals - although my boundaries are slightly different - I can read about it but never look at films/video.  Everyone manages the horrible stuff differently.  When I read sad stories I cry & am sad for ages; when it's to do with evil treatment I shake with anger and feel sick inside - and often can't get the horror out of my head for a long time.

I'm sure there's all kinds of psychological explanations for our reactions, but I dont really care for the scientific/biological arguments - I think some people are more attuned to nature and animals and understand them as part of our world & the core of life which is precious and good and life-enhancing.  So bad or sad things which detract from that core upset us deeply. And we know we are responsible for caring for that natural world which cannot express itself in our terms. And this is augmented by the indifference of a lot of the rest of people in their blindness to that fundamental of life who see them as less sentient, as 'only'...

For example, my uni board have denied my application for mitigation on one of last terms' modules - when I lost Max I really struggled with grief all term and couldn't keep up with all the work.  But bereavement is only an excuse for family and very close friends - they don't consider that he was both to me, he was 'only a cat' in their burearcratic, regulated world.  Even though their counselling and advice service disagree.

Many hugs and I'm proud to 'know' someone like you who feels that deeply.


Logged

"I can think of many ways in which I would become a better person if I were more like my cats. But I cannot think of a single way in which my cats would be any better for being more like me."  A.N.Wilson
lesliek
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 11095


Trooper,Remy & Fragile


« Reply #12 on: February 10, 2010, 07:50:51 AM »

Great job Alec ! You got her to get medical treatment & probably saved that cats life or at least its eye.  Some days I can't read memorials or abuse either. Like JJ I just can't stand people who abuse the helpless,animals,children or seniors. Just do what you can and be happy that you made a difference this time. Hopefully this woman will do the same if she sees another situation like this,and say something then to whoever is involved.
Logged

"the world's most inept extortionist"
mainecoonpeg
Guest
« Reply #13 on: February 10, 2010, 09:21:18 AM »

alek................YOU ROCK............!!!!!

Because of you, this kitty now has the necessary medicines to help with wellness and healing.

Bless you alek and thank you.
Logged
bug
Hero Member
*****
Posts: 4905

RIP little angel Katey


« Reply #14 on: February 10, 2010, 10:34:13 AM »

Alek, I'm so glad you persisted in this case. Good on you!

When I run across situations like this and I can't seem to appeal to the compassionate side of most individuals, I go after their wallet. I have a colleague who got a kitten from a shelter. I gave him reams of information including simple stuff like feed him good food, get a covered litterbox, yadda, yadda. He didn't listen on points one or two and last week, he came to me complaining that his cat was peeing in areas other than his litterbox. It sounded like a UTI and I told him if he didn't get the cat to a vet, his special needs daughter could be saying goodbye to him very soon. He thought that if he made some diet changes that the problem would go away. I finally put it this way -- "If you wait another day, your cat might start urinating blood, then get blocked from crystals and if you're lucky and he doesn't die, it will cost you over $300 for something that can be fixed TODAY for $75."

He took the cat in that evening and he was fine. It turns out that it was behavioral and stopped once the construction crew got out of his space (ya think?).

Some people don't get it until you spell it out in dollars and cents. It's too bad but I think people like us have intuition and compassion and some lack either or both though they still care about their pets in their own, strange way.

Logged

My little babies, you'll always be in my heart. Mom will see you later. Look after each other, ok?
Pages: [1] 2
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Copyright 2007 Itchmo.com: Read the latest cat, dog and pet news, pet food recall info, product reviews and more — updated daily.
Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2015, Simple Machines | Sitemap