Reading the comments on Geoff's thread, I too am dreading Birthday & Xmas.

For me, these come together (B'day 3 days before Xmas), and 27th will be the 4 month anniversary of my beloved boy's passing.

I am not feeling at all celebratory this year, and keep thinking about the last one - b/f and I spent Xmas day here, just us & the cats.  b/f always brings cat presents wrapped - and we sit & share opening all presents after the meal (and of course Max shared some of that too).

After we'd settled Max comfy on his new jumper (one of Mark's ex-best ones which had worn a bit!) and they'd slobbered out on the catnip tea, Mark sat back & said :
     "All I want for Xmas next year is to have Max with us still"
 

We have no plans for this year - I can't bear the thought of spending the day in the same way as last - but without our boycat.

Since many of us will be feeling the same, I propose we have a 'meeting' memorial here, and maybe candle lighting, & share some of the inevitable tears.  No idea what shared time we could do - I guess I'm +6-8 hours on most of you but tend to get up & stay up late.

Sure
I just felt it would be good to have a brief time to think & share 'together', and was looking to see if others here wanted to 'gather' around a given time on Dec 25.

But maybe not many are struck by the idea?  I guess many people are very occupied with family etc that day and comitting to a time is hard.  Maybe its not even practical technically. But I'm open to suggestions.

The holidays are always a rough time of year for DH and myself, from Thanksgiving to New Year's.  We've lost the majority of our angel dogs and cats over the years just between those particular holidays.  So, we dread them every year.  But we have also adopted new kittens and puppies that time of year, so we like to celebrate those, as well. 

I haven't been able to come on here in a while...  my computer has been acting up, but you all are in my hearts!  

I wanted to comment here because this section of this forum is, well...  the place where our memories can live on... a little section in this world where we can connect with those that truly understand our hurt.  These days do bring up the many emotions in our hearts that we hold deep inside, perhaps because we try to mask them up so we can "live" the rest of the year.  I do believe that our loss never leaves us.  That empty place is and will remain, we just learn to function regardless of its presence.  I guess though, when I look deep down inside my heart, beyond my hurt and beyond my pain...  I feel blessed.  Just as I know all of you do as well.  We have been blessed with the presence of our little ones and had the opportunity to experience them and their love so much so that we will forever have them, their memory.... so much so that we will always be connected, and one day......  yes one glorious day.... we will be with them again.  I wanted to share this song with you today.. maybe some of you have already heard it.  It is sung by Steven Curtis Chapman, who I feel so connected to since he lost his daughter to a tragic accident.  Just by his words, and the way he expresses them.. it hits so close to home.  It seems as if he takes the words out of my heart.  

So to those of us that have this empty... this hurt... I would like to offer some hope...  Hold fast, until then, Heaven is the Face of our little ones.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9JTwJ_1lzE

mgt, "Heaven in the Face"...what a beautiful song. Thank you for sharing.

I think the holiday memorial is a good idea. I'm very much dreading the holidays this year.  I have a pet sitting business, mostly cat care, so the holidays are absolutely my busiest time of the year with everyone leaving town to see their families.  I usually just send my husband home to spend time with his parents and siblings because I'm so busy and don't really have time to celebrate.  However, when I come at night Peanut and Tig would be waiting here for me and we would spend xmas together.  This year it's just me & Tig now that little Peanut is gone.  It's going to be a sad, lonely holiday season.

I don't know that I could be online at a particular time with my schedule, but it would be nice to check in when I can.

I am in tears - I've just read all your amazing tributes to all your wonderful, beloved kids, and posted my own to the cat-love of my life.

To all:
  may our loved one's spirits be blessed with light and peace and love
  may they run free and in joy, bathed in all the love we shared
  and still hold in our hearts
  forever

And to all the poor lost spirits who never knew the love and care our babies had:
  please run with them,
  there's light and love enough to heal you too
  although we couldn't find and save you here
  please know that care and love is for you now.


 
 

Early December 2007...